OPINION
After sending off my draft of my column for the Friday, Sept. 18 issue of the Post-Signal, I was sitting, having my breakfast, mulling over what I had just written and sent.
I mentioned AI in the column regarding correcting my spelling and grammar.
I began thinking about how I feel about AI and all the hype about it taking over the world and humans becoming slaves to it.
I thought, AI could never think like a human and take over the world since it’s programmed not to make errors and we, as human beans, make errors all the time.
I’m leaving the word beans exactly where it belongs.
When I said “beings” (AI heard it as beans, I over emphasized the pronunciation of beings, got beans again, then over emphasized it a second time and got VN.)
This is exactly what I mean.
I said human being and AI heard it as beans.
Well, I guess our human brains are kind of like beans.
Lots of varieties and no two beans exactly alike.
My thought process said to me, “AI would have to be wired into a human‘s brain, function exactly like a human, making all the exact errors that we make in our lives, to become our masters. Could that be possible?”
So, I started writing my next column right then and there. While my thoughts were fresh on my mind.
Think of yourself as a baby, learning to walk. You want to take that first step.
Mom and dad are encouraging you to do it.
You hesitate. They hold out their arms, promising to catch you and then they back up a step.
You say to yourself, “What’s that all about?”
Then, you correct your thinking—haven’t they always rushed to you when you cried out or whimpered?
Sure. They have always been there when you needed them!
You let go of that coffee table, you wobble a little bit on your feet, you put your hand back on the coffee table. Finally, you let go and take that first step and down you go.
You were right, mom and dad came rushing to your side.
They’re gushing all over you, congratulating you on that first step. They pick you up, the three of you snuggle together.
Bliss. You can barely breathe.
You are filled with emotion, elated with your accomplishment.
Mom and dad are so proud.
A few years pass, you are a teenager.
Your parents aren’t so encouraging.
You are on restriction. You made a bad choice and now you’re being punished for it.
You’re emotional, telling them it’s just not fair. They are emotional right back at you.
In fact, they are wondering why you can’t be like that sweet baby, taking your first step.
Same you, same parents, same AI is wired to your brain.
Think of all the emotions that AI had to experience during these two different episodes.
Not only your emotions, but observing what your parents’ emotions
were.
Really, really feeling it.
AI is much like Mr. Spock from Star Trek. He just didn’t get the emotions, and neither will AI. It’s just not wired that way— it’s only pieces that have been fabricated together to operate in a specific way.
Like your car.
To my way of thinking, AI never will catch John. No, AI. I didn’t say catch John, I said catch on.
To repeat, AI never will catch on.
Every single human being is different, with different experiences that cause different judgments.
Sometimes, humans react differently to the exact same situation.
Maybe we’re tired, lonely, happy, hungry.
Everything we experience makes us who we are.
Can a machine taste a savory bite of food or chocolate melting in its mouth?
Can a machine know hunger or fullness after Thanksgiving dinner?
Can it enjoy a hug from another human being?
Can it be insulted by an off-color joke or laugh at a comedian making fun of himself?
Can a machine feel the emotion of a stubbed toe, a cut finger, kidney failure or the loss of a loved one?
I admit, I haven’t thought a whole lot about the problem of AI taking over the world.
Don’t know why it came to me that morning to even write about it, but it did and that morning I was convicted to write about it.
But then, I’m only human. Speaking of comedy and being human, I was delighted to attend the performances of the Clean Comedy Collective on Friday night.
There was a lot of belly shaking—all four of them were so funny.
And so human—one of them making fun of his own belly.
Isn’t that what comedy is all about?
Making fun of our own human frailties?
Something AI would not appreciate?
If I had not attended, I would’ve missed another wonderful surprise.
Three friends, who moved away a couple of years ago, dropped into the coffee house towards the end of the performance.
I did not realize who it was until the end when my attention was drawn to them.
I looked from the daughter to the mother to the father before recognizing them.
Then, I let out a war hoop of joy.
The comedians must’ve thought I was having a heart attack.
Remember back in May when I said I was going to reach out to people I hadn’t been in touch with? They’re one of the families.
Wonderful comedy, wonderful friends, wonderful joy.
Can life get any better? Would AI understand or appreciate any of this?
I sure did!
And, like you, I enjoyed the rain last week.
Cindy “Mama C” Faris is a Pilot Point resident, and she is offering life advice for any who want it. She can be reached at [email protected].
